PLURderapolis

Consent Culture

Creating a safer PLUR community together

What is Consent Ongoing Process Resources Quick Tips Scenarios

Introduction

Consent isn't just sexy. It's necessary. Especially in nightlife spaces where people are vulnerable, intoxicated, overstimulated, or all of the above.

At PLURderapolis, we believe in creating spaces where everyone feels safe, respected, and empowered. That's why consent culture is at the heart of everything we do.

Understanding Consent

✅ Consent is:

  • Freely given – Not coerced, pressured, or guilt-tripped.
  • Reversible – You can say yes, then change your mind at any time.
  • Informed – Everyone knows exactly what's going on.
  • Enthusiastic – If it's not a hell yes, it's a no.
  • Specific – Saying yes to one thing doesn't mean yes to everything.

(That spells FRIES if you need to remember it.)

🚫 Not consent:

  • "They didn't say no."
  • "They were into it earlier."
  • "They didn't fight me."
  • "They were drunk/high."
  • "They didn't respond."

Silence or lack of resistance does not equal consent. Only an enthusiastic, ongoing "yes" means yes.

🎶 In rave spaces:

  • Loud music + substances + vibes ≠ implied consent.
  • Don't touch people without asking: not even to dance, grab hands, or hug.
  • Don't assume someone's outfit, flirting, or dancing means anything more than what it is.
  • People who are rolling, drunk, tripping, or otherwise altered can't ethically give consent — and Minnesota law treats someone who is physically helpless or mentally incapacitated as unable to consent (Minn. Stat. 609.341). When in doubt, stop.

Remember: PLUR means Peace, Love, Unity, and Respect for all.

⚠️ Quick check-in phrases:

  • "Are you good with this?"
  • "Want me to keep going?"
  • "Let me know if you want to stop."
  • "Is this okay?"
  • "How are you feeling?"

Keep it clear, casual, and ongoing. Consent isn't one question. It's a whole-ass conversation.

🏳️‍🌈 Respect all identities.

Don't misgender people. Don't make assumptions. Don't use someone's gender or sexuality as an excuse to be invasive or weird. Transphobia, homophobia, and racism = not welcome here.

Our community celebrates diversity and expects everyone to respect each other's identities and boundaries.

🔥 What to do if someone crosses a line:

  • If it's happening now, intervene safely or get help.
  • Support the person, not the abuser, not the rumors.
  • Believe survivors. Listen first. Don't center yourself.
  • Consent violations aren't just private drama. They're community safety issues.

If you witness or experience a consent violation, report it to event staff, use our accountability process, or leave an anonymous tip.

FRIES Check In: Try It Yourself

Run any moment through the five FRIES questions. Answer honestly. There are no wrong answers here, only clearer ones.

Scenario Check: Is This Consent?

Five short scenes from real nights out. Tap each card to see the call.

Scene 1

You're dancing with someone. They said yes to dancing, but halfway through they go still and stop responding.

Not consent

Freezing is a common stress response, not a yes. Stop, give them space, and check in with words: "Hey, are you okay? Want to take a break?" Only continue with a clear, enthusiastic yes.

Scene 2

Someone is very drunk but seems into it and keeps pulling you closer.

Not consent

A person who is heavily intoxicated cannot give informed consent, no matter how into it they seem. Help them get water, find their friends, or get them home safe instead.

Scene 3

They said yes to coming back to your place earlier. Now they're quiet in the car.

Not a yes anymore

Consent is reversible and specific to the moment. Check in honestly: "We can just hang out, or I can take you home. What do you want tonight?"

Scene 4

You put your arm around someone at the rail. They didn't say no.

Not consent

Silence is not a yes. Ask first, every time: "Is this okay?" It takes two seconds and it changes everything.

Scene 5

They asked you to dance, keep checking that you're having fun, and ask before trying anything new.

Yes, this is consent

This is what it looks like: enthusiastic, ongoing, and mutual. Match that energy.

Consent is an Ongoing Process

True consent culture extends far beyond getting a "yes" or respecting a "no." It's about creating environments where everyone feels empowered to communicate their boundaries and have them respected throughout every interaction.

Continuous Check-ins

Consent isn't a one-time question. Check in regularly with your partners, especially as situations evolve or intensify.

Non-Verbal Cues Matter

Pay attention to body language. Stiffening, pulling away, or avoiding eye contact may indicate discomfort even when words don't.

Enthusiastic Participation

Look for active participation rather than passive acceptance. The absence of a "no" doesn't equal the presence of a "yes."

Changing Minds is Normal

People can withdraw consent at any time, for any reason. Respecting this is fundamental to consent culture.

Remember: Consent isn't just about avoiding violation. It's about actively creating safety and respect.

Resources & Support

View Accountability Process Ride Safety Guidelines Learn About Rejection-Based Violence

Quick Tips for Consent Culture

Communicate Clearly

Use direct language and check for understanding. Don't rely on assumptions or hints.

Respect Boundaries

When someone sets a boundary, honor it immediately without question or negotiation.

Be an Active Bystander

If you see something that doesn't look right, check in with the person who might need support.

Check Your Intentions

Ask yourself why you want to interact with someone. Is it for mutual connection or your own gratification?

PLURderapolis stands for safe dance floors.
If someone tells you a person made them uncomfortable or violated consent, take it seriously.

If you feel unsafe or unsure what to do, check our Emergency Resources, or find a trusted peer, medic, or venue staff member.